Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
Your cat ate my taco.
. . . I don't have a cat?
It was laying in your bed. Now it's hunting for more tacos.
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