he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
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