it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
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