respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
cat food counts as protein by the way
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
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