'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
I think I deserve an award for the breakup text I sent him. Like a pulitzer prize or a donut or something.
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