Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
Randomize
