you guys were way drunker than both of me
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
Success! We fucked roommates!
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
Randomize
