I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
The housekeeper found my huge dildo under the bathroom sink, and another in the living room. I can't get much more single than this.
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
Randomize
