where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
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