I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
I was doing drugs in the men's room so my employee went in to the woman's for the same reason but left proof and got caught. Had to fire him cuz I bogarted his dope spot. Awesome.
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
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