If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
You brought string cheese to the strip club
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
Randomize
