Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize
