we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
Randomize
