chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
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