I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
So I told him it takes a lot to get me drunk & he said he was the heavyweight champion in college. We high-fived. Obviously I'm the favorite child.
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize
