Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
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