When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
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