I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
Even my vagina gasped.
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
Randomize
