I'm going to rape someone's good day.
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
Randomize
