I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
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