I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
Randomize