I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
You need a sexual gate keeper
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
Adulthood is punching a guy in the face when you find out he's trying to fuck you and he's married instead of fucking him regardless and believing anything he says
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
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