I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
Randomize