I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
Randomize
