you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Randomize
