I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
Randomize