I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
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