Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
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