You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
Randomize