I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
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