Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
Randomize
