literally had 100 drinks last night.
JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
Lest it die in the depths of eternal drunken recall denial...we peed in the street. Middle of the street. Simultaneously. Peed. Street. Middle of street.
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
