Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
Randomize
