wat bout pragnant strippers??
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
I just woke up to my family in the living room watching our security camera tape of me last night talking to a stop sign in our backyard... How the fuck did I get that in the yard?
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
Randomize
