I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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