just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
How many fucks given?
0.12846
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
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