btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
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