We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
You know you're getting old when 19 year olds you've met on tinder advise you that you should start looking for a wife and/or the mother of your children
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
Randomize
