I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
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