The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
Randomize
