why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
She throws back shots like they are NO-THING. I swear, she goes through like five straight tequila shots, does a jello shot, chases with half a hot dog, has a rum and coke, and then takes her shirt off and makes an impromptu bandage out of it for fuckin' Tim who cut himself on the flagpole. I'm going to marry her.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
Randomize
