Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
I was walking around outside with a basket of eggs. I feel like little house on the prairie: hungover edition.
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
Randomize
