some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
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