I gave up sex with dolphins for you.
it's like iHOP with fire
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
i just had to use the keg as a stool to reach the margarita maker. i'm such a problem solver.
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
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