my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
Randomize
