so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
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