How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize