Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
I have two black x marks on my hands.
Yep you got cut off last night after a stripper bent over in front of you and you screamed very loudly 'I can see your soul from here'
damnit I wish I could remember that.
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
Next Halloween, remind me to find a different wingman. Walking out in your pirate costume talking like Captain Ahab while i was banging her and telling me I had to harpoon the white whale really pissed her off.
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
he high fived his dick after we had sex
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