I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
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