i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
