Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
